I used to be so shy that it made me break into a sweat talking to girls. It was so bad that if I opened my mouth as much as I could to say, “Hi,” my vocal pitch went up a few octaves.
“As you might imagine, this didn’t help me woo the ladies exactly (unless you mean by “woo” to make them want to giggle, run away, and/or hide).
A symptom of a common problem shared by many guys like you was my troubles: I was not confident in myself. Know the emotion? Let’s offer a helpful shove in the right direction to your confidence (and dating life). This is how a girl can be asked out and get a yes (almost) each time.
Your Posture Should Scream Confidence
Most men guarantee a rejection before they even open their mouth because their appearance does not express confidence. Here are some simple cues to help you remember the do’s and don’ts of posture.
- Stare at the ground
- Cross your legs/arms
- Slump your shoulders
- Keep your chin up
- Gaze forward
- Shoulders down and back
- Chest highThink of how much space you are taking up while in doubt. Are they a lot, or a little? You could be curled up in a sad little ball (which just doesn’t make you look confident) if you’re not taking up a lot of room.Take as much room as you can with your body to reflect that you are secure with your body (and this goes without saying, hopefully, just keep it within reason, don’t lie down in the middle of the bar on the ground or something crazy!)
1.) The Man’s Clothes
No, when you ask a girl out, you do not have to be dressed in a freshly fitted suit. But that doesn’t mean that you, either, should look like a slob. Wear your personality in whatever style suits, but keep it classy. No wrinkled tees, filthy shoes or other disasters of fashion are permitted. Don’t sweat the details, but dress like the handsome and polished fella you are, whatever you do.2.) Interest Gauging
Eye Contact Engage
Shoot a few innocent glances in her direction if a coffeehouse cutie catches your eye. Linger for a brief moment before turning your focus elsewhere, but unless you want to be branded a creeper, do not move past the five second mark.
This is a positive indication that the feeling might be mutual if she returns your look with a smile.
3.) Do Not Associate Kindness with Attraction
Just because a woman smiles at or speaks to you, does not mean she wants to take your relationship to the next level, so don’t get your hopes up for good reason.
Not sure if a friend likes you or not? Ask her out and if she replies, “What, like a date? ” answer, “Yes! ” without hesitation. Trust is sexy (and even if she says, “No,” at least you’ll know for sure).
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